I Can Resist Anything But Temptation. Also Her Ass.
A dark night on a quiet balcony leads to an illicit affair
The balcony was small.
But the view of her standing on it, her white buttondown shirt barely covering her ass, was too much for me to resist. Her ass was probably not what Oscar Wilde was talking about, but it was the definition of temptation to me.
Maybe I should talk about morality and why we’re often attracted to things we feel we shouldn’t be. Would that be more interesting than telling you I stepped out into the night without any thought of right or wrong? Attraction is one thing, but tell me I can’t have it, and my god, something happens to my brain.
When I wrapped my arms around her from behind, she fell back against my chest. Would it have helped if she turned away? Would it have been better if she took the moral high ground and asked me to leave?
When I kissed her neck, she took my hand and held it to her stomach beneath the thin white cotton shirt, and she sighed so sweetly and so tenderly that I kissed her again. When she leaned forward ever so slightly, I felt myself grow hard against her, and my sigh was more desperate than anything.
If she had turned, I believe I would have stopped. If she had taken me in her arms and looked into my eyes, maybe both of us would have.
But as it was, nothing felt real.
It was night, I was warm, and I could barely see her profile in the darkness. We were both ghosts, and what sin can the dead commit?
When I lifted her shirt, I could see her ass in the moonlight, though. And when I touched her, I saw her tremble. As I slid one hand between her thighs, feeling her soft and wet, I closed my eyes and pretended I felt ashamed.
From there, it was frantic motion as I unbuckled, unzipped, and unearthed.
She rested one arm on the railing, spread her legs ever so sightly, and parted her lips with two fingers. The tease lasted only seconds because anything longer might have led to thought.
In truth, I had never wanted anyone as much as I did her. I had never longed to see a naked body, feel soft skin, or bury myself inside anyone as much as I did her, and it was a longing that had grown dangerous through my resistance.
Which is all to say, that I attacked her with my desire, sliding into her and fucking her hard as I tried not to think about where all that lust might go once we finished. She pushed back, continued to touch herself, and moaned my name mixed with yes again and again. She clenched around me, shaky on her legs as I gripped her ass and pressed my face into her long hair.
I must have said something about love because I heard her muffled laugh as we fucked under silent stars and just a sliver of a moon. When my legs nearly gave out, she leaned forward and pushed back, taking me deep inside her as I began to come, and right then, the darkness didn’t feel close to dark enough.
After I pulled out and covered up, I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her neck and her back. She covered my hands with her own and let me hold her while neither of us said a word.
And then, before she could turn around and make me confront my demons, I slid back indoors and found my room where I could hide in solitude and ponder regret.
She didn’t knock on my door.